FLORIDA SPRING BREAK WE CANT GET CORONA HAHAHA

man it is so great that young people cant get coronavirus hhaha all those old people stuck inside. thats why we decided to go to down to Ft Lauderdale for spring break. I do not work or go to school, so it was not a break for me, just a normal day with lots of sand. i woke up and smoked a joint because if i dont i feel kind of off, like a guy who fucks horses feels when he has to have sex with his wife. i walked onto the beach with my man Jerome and started to lose my high as we were dancing. i took out a joint and smoked it but i felt nothing. usually, i stop feeling that hole inside me, which i can only compare to the time Kobe Bryant died. he got killed in a cool helicopter crash and theres no way my death would be that awesome. thats a gape i can never fill. i curled up on the sand, and i started to…to feel dead. then the clouds parted, and a figure appeared in the sky. it was Kobe Bryant. he said DON’T SPEAK. BEFORE TIME THERE WAS KOBE. AFTER TIME THERE IS KOBE. IAM ACTUALLY A LIFEFORCE THAT LIVES IN ALL, THAT BREATHES IN ALL. I CAN NEVER TRULY DIE, BECAUSE I AM BEYOND THE STARS AND THE MOON. BRYANT WAS MY LINEAGE FATHER. HE BIRTHED ME 600000000 YEARS AGO BEFORE THE UNIVERSE WAS EVEN BORN. THE NAME OF A DJ SHOULD BE RASHA KHAN. THE NAME OF A POPE SHOULD BE FRANCISCO XXII. THE NAME OF FLORIDA SHOULD BE HUEY SHOP. SHANTI SHANTI SHANTI. TELL THEM I AM NOT DEAD. I AM JUST RESTING. then Kobe pulled back one of the clouds like a curtain. Robin Williams, Lisa “Left Eye” Lopez, and Anne Frank all stared back at me. they spoke a t the same time: WE KNOW YOU CAN DO IT, JIMMY. SMOKE THE BIGGEST JOINT THAT EVER EXISTED. and then they disappeared. i opened my eyes and there were like five cops and EMTs standing over me with hundreds of onlookers. they told me i just had a panic attack. one of the cops said, it’s a big problem. this coronavirus has got their hormones all wound up. the other cop said dont act like you werent after it when you was his age. the first cop said, yep, and all my girlfriends had the same name, Vaseline. they laughed a boys will be boys laugh and left me there to die. i stumbled home and collapsed on my bed. my grandma brought me some pancakes. she said i hope you didnt catch the Wuhan Flu. I said dont worry about that nan. Someone is watching over us. and as I looked out the window, i saw Kobe Bryant eating pastries in the sky. everyone in my household ended up with corona virus.